• Saturn Return Survivor T-Shirt- funny tshirt by Niche Goods
  • Saturn Return Survivor T-Shirt- funny tshirt by Niche Goods
  • Saturn Return Survivor T-Shirt- funny tshirt by Niche Goods
  • Saturn Return Survivor T-Shirt- funny tshirt by Niche Goods
  • Saturn Return Survivor T-Shirt- funny tshirt by Niche Goods
  • Saturn Return Survivor T-Shirt- funny tshirt by Niche Goods
  • Saturn Return Survivor T-Shirt- funny tshirt by Niche Goods
  • Saturn Return Survivor T-Shirt- funny tshirt by Niche Goods
  • Saturn Return Survivor T-Shirt- funny tshirt by Niche Goods
  • Saturn Return Survivor T-Shirt- funny tshirt by Niche Goods
  • Saturn Return Survivor T-Shirt- funny tshirt by Niche Goods
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Saturn Return Survivor T-Shirt

Saturn Return Survivor T-Shirt

$35.00 USD
$35.00 USD
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You did it—you crawled through the cosmic bootcamp that is your Saturn Return and came out (mostly) intact. Now celebrate the scars with the “Saturn Return Survivor” T-shirt.

Printed on cloud-soft, ringspun cotton that can handle existential crises, this unisex tee features a distressed planet-badge graphic and midnight-ink text that stays sharp longer than your quarter-life crisis lasted. Pre-shrunk, ethically stitched, and available XS–4XL—because surviving Saturn’s smackdown is a flex anyone should wear.

Perfect for:

  • Astro-obsessives who schedule therapy sessions by retrograde calendar
  • Alt souls who traded their 27-club angst for 30-flirty-and-thriving memes
  • Anyone who side-eyes crises with “Been there, orbited that, got the T-shirt”

The tri-blend fabric creates a vintage, fitted look. And extreme durability makes this t-shirt withstand repeated washings and still remain super comfortable.

• 50% polyester, 25% combed ring-spun cotton, 25% rayon
• Fabric weight: 3.4 oz/yd² (115.3 g/m²)
• Pre-shrunk for extra durability
• 40 singles
• Regular fit
• Side-seamed construction
• Blank product sourced from Guatemala, Nicaragua, Honduras, or the US

This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!

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Age restrictions: For adults EU Warranty: 2 years Other compliance information: Meets the flammability level requirements.

In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Oak inc. and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards.

For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at gpsr@sindenventures.com. You can also write to us at 123 Main Street, Anytown, Country or Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.